I’m not the person that I was Before Before my entire world came crashing down around me I try not to linger in sadness and self-pity but sometimes, you’ve just got to drink the wine And I take a big deep sip That rolls on my tongue and down the back of my throat It hits the spot like a morphine drip The pain is washed away temporarily providing me relief A chance to sleep A moment to forget So I exhale and lift the cup again
I danced with the devil last night. Alone in my room, I waited for you. My mouth began to taste of blood. I should have known. I should have felt the ice slip through my veins. I should have heard the screams that chilled the darkness. Time ticked by. Seconds dragging on for hours. With every passing second of my life, you love me, only less. I long to die. And so I dance in my sleep. The blood in my veins will stop flowing and dry up. When you
We grieve more for ourselves than for those who have died One of the only things guaranteed in this world is death and so it surprises me how unprepared we are as a species for when someone we love dies. We are often completely thrown without the slightest idea how to treat people who are grieving. A little pat on the back and a sorry for your loss is usually the go to response. But really, how useful is that kind of behaviour and what is a good way to
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger I love this saying. I don’t know why but after the last five months it feels more true than ever. If you follow my blog, you will know what I’ve been going through. Life has been tough. If you don’t well in a nutshell, I gave birth to my son in September via Emergency C-Section. The days that followed were a nightmare. I suffered numerous complications and nearly died. I don’t think too many people know the meaning of looking death in
My New Business Launch Hello darlings, I sure have missed you. If you don’t already know, I’ve been majorly consumed with the launch of my new website. Have you seen it? Check it out… jonelledupont.com I feel really proud of it. I’ve been working on it since July last year, on and off trying to decide exactly what it is I wanted to do and then once I had finally decided, I spent ages writing articles and making it perfect only to completely rebrand it a couple of days before launching.
Hello everyone, I know I’ve been really quiet the last few weeks. Life is pretty damn tough. Now that my son is no longer just sleeping all day and actually needs to be entertained, I have hardly any time for anything other than playing peek-a-boo and making bottles. It’s all worth it I swear. Remember this photo? Yup, that’s me with my colostomy bag right after I got out the hospital. My tummy has gone down a lot (it was really swollen and I just had a baby) and it’s
2015 was a really hectic year for me. There were so many downs and a really really huge up with the birth of my son but after spending months at the hospital, I was ready to put the year behind me. After all, a new year represents new beginnings and fresh starts and all things wonderful that come with starting a new page in a new book. So on New years eve when my husband insisted that we go to the hospital, I point-blank refused. The pain and discomfort I
Christmas is such a special time of year. Since I was a little girl it has been the most wonderful occasion. As a little girl, waking up on Christmas morning to find the tree surrounded by all those presents from Santa. Boy was he a generous chap! Yup, it was awesome. The thing about having divorced parents means you get to celebrate Christmas not once but twice every year. First was waking up at my dad’s parents’ home opening presents and having a big breakfast. After spending a wonderful morning
We live in a world of instant gratification. Everything is available at our fingertips. So we form opinions on everything from conflict zones, the presidential campaigns of a foreign country, the political economy and what the housewife next door should have for breakfast. Everything is right there before us, isn’t it and we are free to judge as we please. Stop right there. That’s where you’re wrong. Before you decide that you know what’s best for me. Please ask me. Before you decide to label me and call me names.
It’s nearly the end of the year. Christmas is around the corner, literally a few days away and I thought that makes it a pretty good time to do some reflecting over the last year. Blog life I started my blog in January, after a short attempt at blogging unofficially and discovering that writing is my absolute passion. Someone asked me long ago to think about pursuing a life as a writer and I brushed her off. Well, turns out I spent an awful lot of my life having no
This weekend was a tough one for me. It was the first time I’ve chosen to leave my baby in the care of someone else for a reason other than being in hospital. A few weeks ago we came across a great discounted offer for a Bed & Breakfast in a little town about 45 minutes from where we live. We decided that we needed a break from our real lives, from our drama and the last 3 months. So we booked ourselves in. I have been so excited about
The last three months have been difficult. I mean really really tough. The kind of hard that drains you and you find yourself desperate to escape and find yourself in someone else’s life. If you follow my blog, you will know about the trauma that I’ve been through. If you don’t, you can read this post about what happened. I’m not writing this to complain so much as I’m just trying to gain perspective for myself. This has been the longest and hardest year of my life but it’s getting
I can’t emphasise enough how much my mother means to me. I can’t begin to explain how much my mother does for me. EVERYTHING. She does it all. She hugs me when I’m sad. She pats me on the back when I succeed. She holds my hand when I’m afraid. She helps me heal when I’m injured. She stood by my bedside for a month when I was ill. She has loved me since 1983 and until 2015, I had no idea how much that filled her heart. Not until I became
There are those dark days, we all have them. We think we’re incapable and not good enough. We don’t believe in ourselves, we don’t think that we have what it takes. Then, we put our heads down, put in the hours and get it done! Suddenly, we are incredible and we’ve done exactly what we needed to do! BOOM! We’re the freaking badass that we always knew we could be. It’s not always easy but you’ve got to believe in yourself! I wrote a post recently about that feeling you