When I was growing up, I wasn’t sure if I wanted children. If you asked me, I’d have said “mmm we will see what happens.” I’ve never been overly into kids in the way that some people are. I never thought I’d be good at being a mother either. I was never a natural with children. Just usually quite awkward. Occasionally people would ask me if I want to have children and I’d say “I don’t think so” and they’d say “you’ll change your mind” and “your maternal instinct will
So this is a bit of a personal one for me. It’s about taking antidepressants and anti-anxiety meds. A long time ago (11 years to be exact) I was put on antidepressants. I HATED IT! I felt like I had lost myself. I had in fact just lost my father. He died, unexpectedly in a car accident and his death was a HUGE blow to my life. I was 23 years old. I was just starting my life as an adult on my own and I was devastated. My world
To everything there is a season To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under the sun. A time to be born and a time to die; a time to plant and a time to pluck up that which is planted; a time to kill and a time to heal … a time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to dance … a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to lose and a
The last few weeks have been really tough. My surgery went amazingly (Read about that here) well and a week after being sent home from the hospital I went for a check up and my surgeon happily reported that everything was perfect and it’s all over. I smiled all the right smiles but in my heart, I knew that if something seemed too good to be true, well then, it probably is. Sadly I was right. From right after surgery, I’d had a sharp pain just to the right of
In September, after a number of complications, I woke up as an Ostomate. If you don’t know what an Ostomate is, don’t worry, neither did I till I was one. (Catch up on that story here) Ostomate, noun The definition of an ostomate is a person who has undergone a surgical procedure to create an opening in the body that will be used to discharge wastes. A person who had cancer and who can no longer expel waste naturally who has a surgery performed to create a port that bodily
So the last 7 months have been a roller-coaster of every kind of emotion. If you follow my blog, you know the story. If not, in summary, I had a baby in September and then had a whole lot of surgery after that, a stint in ICU and a little near death experience. I kid you not. Things have been hectic for me. Not only have I been trying to adjust to being a new mom which is bloody hard in itself, but I’ve also been dealing with my emotions
My New Business Launch Hello darlings, I sure have missed you. If you don’t already know, I’ve been majorly consumed with the launch of my new website. Have you seen it? Check it out… jonelledupont.com I feel really proud of it. I’ve been working on it since July last year, on and off trying to decide exactly what it is I wanted to do and then once I had finally decided, I spent ages writing articles and making it perfect only to completely rebrand it a couple of days before launching.
There are those dark days, we all have them. We think we’re incapable and not good enough. We don’t believe in ourselves, we don’t think that we have what it takes. Then, we put our heads down, put in the hours and get it done! Suddenly, we are incredible and we’ve done exactly what we needed to do! BOOM! We’re the freaking badass that we always knew we could be. It’s not always easy but you’ve got to believe in yourself! I wrote a post recently about that feeling you
Over the course of the last few weeks, I’ve been feeling a hell of a lot like I’ve NO idea what I’m talking about and I’ve nothing to offer. I’ve been trying to figure out what my superpowers are and what it is that makes people keep coming back to my blog. It’s an awful feeling because along with it, come writers block! I’ve had serious writers block where every idea I have just seems like rubbish and a waste of my time! Finally, I read up a whole lot
I think about my husband coming home, to an empty house, to an empty bed. I think about my bedside table, filled with junk, that I’ve been meaning for a while to sort through. I think about the bathroom cabinet with all my products, hardly used. I think about my closet, filled with appropriate clothes made to never go out of style. I think of the photo albums, of me, in my childhood, of my family home. I think of all the shoes and bags, taking up space, now abandoned.
A little while ago, a broken and damaged woman, newly a mother, newly without an appendix lay in a hospital bed in a tiny part of town. The news – we’re going to go back in. “In where?” you might ask, into the cavity of my body. The one they just took my son out of and a few days later the remains of an organ. The reaction – fear. Of course. I looked him in his eyes and I said “Okay, but promise me you won’t let me die”
I love writing about my experiences so that other people know they aren’t alone. I’ve had some pretty crappy times in my life but I’ve had some pretty amazing ones too! Life is a mix of ups and downs and sometimes you just have to close your eyes and make the leap to find your way! You never know what’s going to happen and sometimes it’s nice to just take a chance and try something new. In this case, Shanita took a huge leap of faith and moved across the world
I wasn’t the best student in school. In fact, I was pretty damn lazy about it. I once woke up to an actual hiding from my aunt for not studying. In my defence though, it was really boring and I was 12. Anything else in the world was more exciting than the book I was supposed to be learning from. When I got to high school, it was always the same. I’d get my work done immediately after school so that I didn’t have to think about it again. Instead
I was 16 years old the first time an openly HIV positive person touched me. I was at a party and this particular person, a friend (let’s call him Dave) asked me to go with him to get something out his car. It was all very innocent, we needed a CD that we wanted to listen to at another friends car. When we got to the car, his window had been smashed. Obviously Dave was really upset. He was 18 and his car had just been broken into. We got
This post is one that has been quite challenging for me to write. How do you begin to talk about love as if you have all the answers. I certainly don’t pretend to. All I know about love, I have learnt in my own journey to be loved and to love to the best of my ability. It took me a long time to come to the realisation that in order to be loved, you have to first love yourself. I don’t mean in the arrogant way where you get