I almost never post on a Saturday. Weekends are sacred family time for me – usually I’m not even at home long enough to type anything out but today, things are bugging me and I had to write. Creative release as therapy and all that.
So, what’s bothering me?
Last night, we went to a friend’s birthday party. We left home at about 6.30pm, even though we were supposed to be there at 6pm but a little baby and being on time don’t always go together so well so we were late. About 3kms from my house there was an accident and the road was closed off.
In the road, was a person. Covered with one of those silver blanket things. A sign of a person who wasn’t waiting for paramedics, or being rushed off. The sign of a person, lying in the street. Dead.
I am fucking angry. I am disappointed with the world. I don’t know why but I am.
I see this person lying there, a biker. Yet another biker (second one I’ve seen dead in the space of two months) and I am angry. I am so mad for his family. Waiting at home, not knowing that he’s not coming home.
He’s never going to walk through the door. Perhaps he has children, perhaps he doesn’t. Perhaps they were waiting for him. Perhaps they weren’t. Perhaps he has a partner, perhaps he doesn’t. Perhaps they’ve started dinner. A meal that no one will eat.
Perhaps he had plans for today. Perhaps he was going out with his family for the day. Perhaps he was planning on staying in.
Instead, this weekend, his family will begin to grieve. They will have people coming around to see them. To sympathise with them. They will start planning his funeral. They will be sad and broken.
Instead of all the things he might have had planned, in a second, it all went away.
And I am angry for him, for his family, for his loved ones, for his dogs. I don’t know him or them or even if he had anyone that loved him. But I am angry at how quickly death comes.
Without notice, without warning. Without a chance to change things.
I am angry.