A question of why, when the doubts start to creep in
The last couple of weeks, Facebook has done the best it could to destroy me. I’m not joking. They changed their algorithm and it has KILLED my blog. Well, almost. So much of my traffic was from Facebook and as the weeks went by, I watched my blog drop off the face of the relevant earth. Seriously, I was right up there with those flat earthers because I watched it walk into the sunset and jump right off the edge. It really made me question what this is all about anyway.
Just like that, my traffic dropped to almost nothing.
For a long time, I’ve read a lot about HOW to build your blog. I know what the tricks are and I know how to make people read your blog (basically write to solve their problems) but I’ve also read a lot about creating good content that you feel you know well and people will read it.
I didn’t pay much attention to it though because this blog wasn’t about making money. It wasn’t and still isn’t about selling out or doing what needs to be done so that brands will work with me. Sure, I do work with brands IF their content and product suits my audience and my style. I will never work with anyone that I don’t fully support.
In short, I write about what matters to me.
This blog is my space in the world to get my very opinionated feelings out into the world… and I love my blog. The fact that I have readers is a lovely bonus BUT if I’m honest with you, and myself, it hurts to suddenly find that no one is reading it anymore.
People make comments like “oh, have you stopped blogging?” or “I’m really missing your blog these days” because in a world over saturated with information, my blog is being drowned out and no one is seeing it. And I’m over here blogging my heart out!
So, I did what any sane person would do.
I had a freaking hysterical melt down and I turned to my best friend twitter for comfort. I tweeted about how I’m struggling with this whole blogging thing and to my great surprise MANY people wrote to me and tweeted me and responded saying how much my blog has helped them, means to them, has affected their lives. I was GOBSMACKED!
I think people don’t realise how much it actually means to us as bloggers to know that people are reading but most importantly finding VALUE in the words we pour into the world. I can’t even explain how much these comments changed my mind about giving up.
I was literally ready to throw in the damn towel. Which is funny because I write for me mostly and yet the lack of views on my blog made me question why I bother. I mean, I may as well keep a diary if no one reads my blog because it would be a hell of a lot cheaper and less time-consuming.
ANYWAY I know I’m waffling quite a bit but it has been a rough few days and thankfully I’m over the whole why do I even bother thing.
Thank you for lifting me up and showing me you actually care and most importantly thank you for sharing ALL my posts in my Facebook page after I reached out and asked for help. Thank you!
After my giant emotional crisis
I sat down and thought about what this blog means to me and WHO I actually do write it for. I already know that the people reading my blog are women between the ages of 25 and 45 ish… there are some outliers but that’s the bulk of my readership but WHY exactly am I writing this blog.
And here’s what I came up with…
I write this blog, to encourage, inspire and empower women (you all knew that right?). I want women to be more themselves and be more okay with not fitting into any of the moulds that society expects them to fit into.
I want to encourage women to speak up, to stand up, to stand tall and be heard! I want my blog to make women feel powerful and empowered with the idea that they matter. Because we do.
It doesn’t matter what our roles are.
Whether we work full-time or part-time or not at all. Whether we have kids or don’t want kids or hadn’t really thought about it yet. ALL those different types of women are the women I write for. I write for women who aren’t always so sure of themselves. Who sometimes need a little encouragement to stand up and speak for themselves.
I write this blog because I am passionate about showing women that you can define success as any damn thing you want it to be. I am passionate about showing women that speaking up doesn’t mean you’re a bitch. It just means you have a voice and you’re not afraid to use it.
I want women to know that they are valid, their opinions are valid and they can and should stand tall.
THAT is why I write this blog. And honestly, I feel a little silly that it took me this long to figure it out anyway.
I don’t always read and I don’t always comment when I read. I love that you pour your heart and soul into your blog and your posts and you are what you say you are!
All our views have dropped thanks to Facebook. But I think this blog keeps you sane as much as it does us. Keep on blogging
Thanks so much Dhanusha, you’re right – it does keep me sane and honestly, I LOVE my blog but it’s just exhausting to think one small change can ruin everything! xoxo
It’s no secret that I absolutely love your blog! Your honesty is inspiring and contagious. You say what we are all thinking, but don’t say. You tell it like it is and unapologetically. I absolutely love that about you! Subscribers/followers and viewings on our blogs is so important to us that it can drive us crazy, just like the follow/unfollow trend on instagram. But what counts it real and authentic content that is written from the heart and that is exactly what we find here. I love your work and you keep me coming back for more, but honestly I’m so happy to have found a friend in you too. Thank you for being your awesome and unapologetic self!
You are always so good at making the tears flow. I honestly don’t know how I got so lucky to have you in my life. I have my blog to thank for that, the friendships that result from this little place on the internet. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for not just this comment but ALL your support!! <3
I can absolutely relate to pouring your heart out through words and feeling like you’re not reaching people. I think it’s in our personalities as big hearts and introverts to want to help people and we do this by caring and sharing. But it can be exhausting too! It helps knowing that what you’re putting out there is being read and inspiring others. It’s the cherry on the top and the gold prize and aaaaaall that. It makes all those doubtful days worth it – because what I’ve learned, they are ALWAYS there and they sneak up now and then, even if you’re really positive most of the time. Your blog inspires ME. To be more me. To open up more and boldly be who I am, even if other people don’t like it. To keep pushing forward. To be unique and take up space and do what makes me happy. I love your blog! And I love reading your raw and honest posts. Thank you for sharing this. Please don’t stop blogging!! And if you ever need to vent, I’m here. xx
YESSSS all of this! Thank you so much for the support and encouragement, I really appreciate it. Especially in these moments of why the fuck do I bother but you get it!! It’s exactly what you’ve just said. I’m really thankful that you find meaning in what I write and that you can relate to what I’m going through – makes me feel SO much less aline! xoxo
For the past year I have been terrible at reading other people’s blogs. Live got a little bit insane, but I have actually scheduled an hour in my diary just to ready all my favourite bloggers’ content each day and to show some support. If I am too busy to read blog posts, I am sure many others are too… or they read it, but don’t comment? I am not sure, who knows. All I know is that if you never started this blog, we probably would never have met – and you are a ray of sunshine in my life – even if my kids probably scared you off yesterday. I started reading your blog from the very first post and I was addicted to it – you are raw, honest, no bullshit and fierce… and I admire you for that. You are truly authentic, and your blog helps so many women. I think it is also important to realize that your posts make people feel deeply, and make them feel vulnerable… so it i understandable that not everyone would leave comments as it is quite scary to leave your deepest thoughts for everyone to see.
Don’t ever stop writing.
You literally made me cry! Thank you for this and thank you for your friendship, it means the world to me.
It would take a lot more for your kids to scare me off, I’m afraid they, like you are stuck with me for life!
xoxo
Jonelle! I pop on over when I see on FB that you’ve posted and you are one of only two blogs that I do read these days! I’m always particularly interested in your Migration Tales (of course!) but I also LOVE your realness and authenticity! I’m super grateful that we met through blogging and love that you are as real in chat and video messaging as you are on here. I’m blessed to know you, wonderful lady. <3
Thank you dear friend! I think the best part of my blog is that it has opened up a space for me to embrace friendships that I would never have known possible in the past. I really value you and our friendship and I’m very thankful for these kind and loving words! Thank you for your friendship Elizabeth! xoxo
You are authentic. What we read is what we get. I love how relatable you are. It’s like we’re having a conversation and I’m like “yeah me too” over here. Your interaction with your readers is brilliant too.
Did I mention inspiring? You are that too. In spades.
I can’t really say what I want to see more of… You check all my boxes.?
You are an amazing human. Thanks for saying all the things that made my eyes feel a little like they got something in them 😛
I love engaging with my readers, that’s probably the best part of my blog. Which is why I get so sad when the comments dry up!
Thank you for ALL these super kind words that I often don’t feel I deserve but I’m going to totally accept them in to my brain today, this stubborn brain that needs to listen to these things.
Thank you for always being present!
xx
This is the second time I’m reading a blog post of yours – which is quite impressive. Why? Somehow, your titles keep catching my eye…oh, and how I know this is the second time I’m visiting? Your blog title!
So although I’m not a regular, you get my attention. And that’s something.
Thanks Claire! I appreciate the comment and the repeat visits. Funny, I’ve actually though about changing my blog name because it feels like it’s too something but I’m not sure what, but I never did because I love it. Guess there’s something for a name that is unique. Thanks a lot for popping by!
No – don’t change it – the title is memorable and your ‘silent’ readers can find you again.
I am reading for the Window on Your World which makes a perfect blog to me. I watch your journey to New Zealand hoping that your hurdles will be cleared (and sad to see good people go)
Thank you Diana!
You’re right, it is memorable!
I really appreciate the support!
Hopefully I will be able to share some positive news about my journey to New Zealand soon as our court date is tomorrow and fingers crossed this is the answer I’ve been waiting for!
That epiphany that we write first and foremost for ourselves is critical to keeping the blog going, IMHO – and then yes, for me, who now writes far less frequently – when I do post on my blog, the messages I get are the digital currency of choice. A wise woman told me once “We don’t write for the click, we write for the love of writing”
(Except in the case when we write for money, in which case, when it comes to this algorithm change, my panic is your panic)
I had such a laugh Dave. You don’t disappoint! I so rarely write for money on here that it really shouldn’t be an issue that the algorithm is messing with me. I like that ” we don’t write for the click, we write for the love of writing” sounds like a very wise woman. I’m going to adopt this for my life. Thank you! X
The realness combined with inspiration does it for me. Your “people” will stick with you, even when algorithms work against us. Please do keep going xx
Thank you so much! Sometimes I worry that I’m a little too real on here but I think like you say, that’s what my readers enjoy! Thank you for taking the time to make me feel better, I really appreciate it xoxo
I enjoy your writing and your ‘I don’t give a shit’ approach to life….lol.
I feel the same….and I really don’t think readers realise how much we value their feedback….my views were way down last month. This month has been a bit better, but it’s the pressure…of not posting, not taking pictures…one just needs to take a step back and do some reflection. Don’t worry…we’re here…reading! <3
Thank you Simone! You have always been so supportive of me and my blog and it means the world to me!
No, they really don’t know. Often they read but don’t comment until I say um hello is anyone out there lol You’re right though, the pressure is HECTIC and not just on here but all over social media. I wouldn’t even be on Facebook if it wasn’t for my blog. Thank you my love! xoxox
I enjoy your blog because I love the way you write and the topics you write about. I can relate to a lot of what you write but I also learn from what you write. Please don’t give up because you do have loyal supporters and even if it means I must visit every day to help you see that someone is reading and enjoying what you do, I will, because I enjoy you and your content that much.
You do empower and inspire us so keep at it.
This made me teary! Thank you Kerry, it really means so much to me that you’ve said these things! It’s just so hard feeling like no one comes around which is obviously not true, people do still read my blog but not like before but I should actually be okay with that. Just had a little wobble. After almost 4 years of doing this I feel like I should be further along but then I remember that that isn’t the plan I ever had for this blog! Thank you love! xoxo
Hey Jonelle,
I thoroughly enjoy your writing (“Seriously, I was right up there with those flat earthers because I watched it walk into the sunset and jump right off the edge.” -> I lolled so hard at this image!) and the fact that your content is so relatable. I love your raw, honest, no-nonsense approach – it’s inspiring and does exactly what you intended it to do!
xoxo Raylene
Hey Raylene, thanks for this hilarious comment. I was chuckling so hard here at the thought of you!! Thanks so much for saying that! I am always so worried that my blog is supposed to be supportive and inspiring and ends up being about me moaning about Home Affairs so this really helps so much <3
I like your “do you boo” message and that you’re giving your why. I read your blog because there’s always something interesting here. You remind me that what I’m going through is life, we all experience good and bad and it’s okay.
Thank you Melissa! I must be doing something right then because that’s EXACTLY what I’m trying to do! Thanks for all the support!! Xx
I read your blog, because I enjoy your writing. I enjoy your posts about life in general. So just keep on keeping on, your readers are still here.
Thanks for always being there to support me. It means so much to me <3