She lay her hand on my pregnant belly and I hated myself for thinking what if that’s the last time. I looked at her hand, shaking and covered in wrinkles and I wondered if my son would ever see her smile. I can’t help wondering how little time they have left. I can’t help myself from feeling like the world is about to cheat me. As if them dying is somehow about me. It isn’t. It simply is what it is.
Oh to be young and naive
When we’re young, we wish we could be older. Drink, vote, make our own choices. We go to school and we wish we could be done with that. We start university and we can’t wait for our first job. We start our first job and we can’t wait for our first salary. That salary comes and we can’t wait to get promoted, earn more, succeed. We get the promotion, we get married, we have children. We grow older.
We forget, that the older we get, the older those around us become. Soon, before we have even thought to notice, the people we love, who have been busy raising us, are old and fragile. We’ve wished away our lives and in doing so we’ve wished away theirs too.
No amount of wishful thinking can turn back time. Suddenly heads are covered in grey. Beautiful and grey. Wisdom is told in stories that we won’t be hearing forever. Time changes us. It changes our situations, our experiences, our expectations. Time takes away the people that we love. Whether we notice them growing older and frailer or not.
but by then, so much time has passed
Suddenly, one day, we wake up and the lap we used to sit on is too frail and fragile. Now a gentle kiss on the cheek causes a flinch from pain. And we say I love you more and more as if hearing I love you too can somehow be banked away for a rainy day. A day when all we have is memories. Of a time when we were loved more than anything. By people who had to grow old. Because that’s just how the world works… before we know it, they are old, and then, they are gone.
All we have is today.
32 Weeks Pregnant – Time with my Gran.
Youth is wasted on the young…
This is such a beautiful post! Absolutely love your blog <3 I'm glad I came across it! Hope you find the time to check mine out sometime!
Thank you so much Natalie! I really appreciate that. It always makes me so happy when someone appreciates what I write!
I will have a look at yours now 🙂
So beautiful and true. I am so grateful that my grandmother got to know my son before she passed.
Isn’t it strange how just them meeting makes all the difference… I know the one thing my husband always regrets is meeting me after my father died. He always says how much it would have meant to meet my dad. Family is so special and it’s a special blessing to have them share in as much of our lives as possible!
Beautiful post! Youth is indeed wasted on the young.
Hi! Stopping by from Mom Bloggers Club.
Have a nice day!
Thanks so much Veronica! I just wish we realised earlier on how much we stand to lose!
Have a wonderful day!
Lovely post! The photograph is very expressive. The way you two are looking at the camera, your eyes seem to be telling everything you wrote on the post. Your granny looks really happy and proud. I miss mine a lot. The worst part of living abroad is that family is just so far away.
Thank you Patri! I love the photo – I think it will be one I treasure for a long time to come. I also live quite a way from my grandparents. A 5 hour drive (not as far as a flight away) but tough when you’re pregnant. My grandfather hasn’t been well so we decided to bite the bullet and make the journey. I’m so glad I did. Thanks for your kind words. It’s not easy being far from family and grandparents at this age are such a blessing to have. xx
I was really close to my Gran. I look at my son and feel all the things you do. She would have loved him as she loved me. I miss her everyday. Just beautiful <3
<3
A heart-touchingly beautiful reflection.
Thank you Carol!
♡♡♡ xxx What a beautiful post.
<3 <3 <3 <3 Thank you!