It’s a weird thing when you feel like you’re lying at the bottom of a pit of despair and then suddenly out of no where, you get an email telling you that you’re inspirational and deserve this amazing T-shirt just for being awesome. I guess it’s hard to believe nice things about yourself. In fact, even writing this feels like I’m patting myself on the back. I’m not. In these pictures, which were taken MONTHS ago, I was feeling like death.
If you look under my eyes you can see huge bags that were there as a result of crying. I was struggling with everything that had happened to me. I was falling apart. I was constantly questioning why me! I couldn’t understand what I had done to deserve nearly dying and going through so many surgeries and living my life with a colostomy.
Every single day was a struggle.
I’d wake up and I’d cry and I’d hate life but then, I’d get my shit together and remind myself that life just happens. It’s not about anything you did. I just happened to have Endometriosis. I just happened to have a burst appendix. It wasn’t some divine intervention from the gods. It was just part of life.
It was only once I truly accepted this did I start feeling like I could deal with this. I mustered up all the strength I could and dedicated myself to creating awareness about living with a colostomy instead of hiding in shame.
The funny thing is, when I took these photos, I didn’t want to post them because the bag was visible in most of them. In the end, that doesn’t even matter to me. I’ve posted enough photos of my tummy with my colostomy to suddenly be ashamed of it.
And yet there I was. Apprehensive about baring my dirty secret to the world. I’m not ashamed but sometimes, we need to hit rock bottom before we start to climb back up. Depression isn’t something that can always be explained. I’m grateful that someone looked at me and thought, she’s an inspiration because without even knowing it, they gave me a much-needed boost. Thank you Aida for your act of kindness.
There are many boundaries and barriers in life, but they can be broken with love. Love has no religious, racial, economic, educational, or societal status barriers. It will always shine through, so let’s love and be free! – Simply Believe Brand
Founded in 2015, Simply Believe is a socially conscious clothing brand, driven by the passion to empower people to achieve their individual goals as they move up the ladder to greatness. You can visit their website here: Simply Believe!
*This is not a sponsored post! Just an amazing brand with a message that I believe in, that believed in me when I needed it!