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You are here: Home / Reflections on Life / Social Issues / No, dressing like that isn’t the reason you got raped!

No, dressing like that isn’t the reason you got raped!

3rd July 2017 By Jonelle 6 Comments

Today, I find myself annoyed. REALLY annoyed at the amount of body shaming and blame placing that is going on.

I fail to understand how WOMEN are pointing fingers at other women and saying that dressing in skimpy clothing is showing that you are “available” and it’s your fault for not dressing more conservatively.

NO. 

NO. 

NO!!!! 

Just NO! 

Women are not being raped because they are dressing a certain way they are being raped because MEN rape!

No, dressing like that isn't the reason you got raped! Tyranny of Pink

[bctt tweet=”As women, we should not be perpetuating the idea that rape is a result of clothing.” username=”tyrannyofpink”]

I should be able to walk down the street completely fucking naked and not be raped because this is MY body and I get to do with it as I please.

SO women, stop pointing fingers at the way other women dress.

Someone I know recently said that “little girls dress in short skirts and then wanna cry wolf when they get raped” NO! This isn’t crying wolf. This is CRYING RAPE! AFTER BEING RAPED!!!

Stop saying it’s OUR fault for being raped.

It is the fault of the rapist for not knowing how to control his urges and not knowing that a woman dressed skimpy does not make it your right to her body!

Someone asked me today if I’d dress in a very revealing dress or allow my daughter to dress that way and the truth is, no, I wouldn’t because I don’t feel comfortable enough in my own body. I do however wish I had worn more revealing clothing when I was younger and did have a body that I wish I could go back to.

As for having a daughter, if I ever did have one, I’d teach her that she should love herself and wear what ever makes her feel comfortable. Life isn’t about dressing to protect yourself from rape or OLD women and BABIES wouldn’t get raped. Which they do. While fully clothed in “appropriate” clothing.

The way you dress does not give anyone the right to rape you!

The way you walk, or talk or move and the places your frequent DO NOT GIVE ANYONE THE RIGHT TO RAPE YOU!

It truly saddens me that WOMEN are still saying that if you wear skimpy clothing you can’t blame the men. NO. FUCKING NO!

You should not have to protect yourself from being raped by dressing in a certain way.

MEN should stop raping women.

We need to start teaching our sons that they do not have the right to a woman’s body no matter what she’s wearing or how drunk she is.

We need to stop blaming WOMEN for being raped!

NO! Just NO!

This rant was inspired by a post about Zodwa at the Durban July on this page! 

Read this post I wrote about #MenAreTrash

No, dressing like that isn't the reason you got raped! Tyranny of Pink

Filed Under: Social Issues, Blog Tagged With: brave women, empowered women, rape, South African Crisis, women get raped by men who rape, You are NOT to blame

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Celeste says

    5th July 2017 at 2:52 pm

    A thousand times, YES! I fume every time we have to “rapesplain” to people. It’s so damn easy for people to the “guns don’t kill people…” point yet difficult for some to grasp the fact that a woman’s clothing or lack of does not give rapists a free pass.

    Reply
    • TyrannyofPink says

      7th July 2017 at 10:34 am

      One of the things that makes me most angry with the world!!

      Reply
  2. Melissa Javan says

    3rd July 2017 at 7:30 pm

    I so agree with it – LOUDLY!

    Reply
    • TyrannyofPink says

      4th July 2017 at 10:28 am

      Thank you!

      Reply
  3. Tamarah says

    3rd July 2017 at 1:18 pm

    By the same token, if how you dressed or what you did got you raped, men wouldn’t get raped, or would get raped more, depending on full suit vs nothing but rugby shorts. I do have a little girl, and I want her to be safe and confident, whatever she does or wears. And the sad truth is that often it is men being vocal about rape not being a woman’s fault, whereas women often seem to feel powerless if they can’t bring other women down. We want equality, but so often, we simply are incapable of standing together and building. We would rather climb over each other and push each other off any “higher ground” achieved. And that saddens me more than anything.

    Reply
    • TyrannyofPink says

      3rd July 2017 at 1:21 pm

      Yes Tamarah. Yes to everything you’ve just said. I’m so saddened by this idea that putting the blame on other women would somehow save us. I also wanted to comment that men also get raped so I’m glad you’ve brought that up. I’ve actually seen a woman I know laugh on a post on Facebook about a man being raped. This issue gets me feeling so tense.

      Reply

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Hi, I’m Jonelle

I write things, I make art, I like good food, wine, a whisky after a rough day and I’m always up for a new adventure. I believe we can all contribute to a better world and we should do it while living authentically. I answer to “mommy,” live in Wellington New Zealand with my family and work for Local Goverment. Welcome to my blog…

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