Are we too attached for our own good?

I’m in the position where I’m having to get rid of things. Things that I’ve had for years, some that I love, some that I don’t. It’s really making me wonder if we, are too attached for our own good to things that should simply be things!

There are so many people who will tell you about clutter and hoarding and how bad it is for you and many of them will tell you that things are just things and they don’t make a life and they certainly don’t love us back but I don’t know if that’s true.

“There was a period when I believed stuff meant something. I thought that if you had matching side chairs and a sofa that harmonized and some beautiful lamps to light them you would have a home, that elegance signaled happiness.”
― Anna Quindlen

The story of my desk.

When I was young and I first moved into my own place, I was in the very lucky position to have my dad fully kit out my apartment. I know now how fortunate I am but at the time, it just felt like it was what needed to be done. Of course that was his JOB as a father.

After he died, I became more and more sentimental about the things I owned that he had put into that apartment. A bed that I had outgrown my love for. A table that used to be in my teenage bedroom. A desk, made of cherry wood that he picked out for me. So that I would have somewhere to study.

Some things are easier than others

I’m getting rid of the bed. It’s time to let go. But that old cherry wood desk seems so much like something my dad would have in his own house that I’m really struggling to let go of it. It’s like I’d be getting rid of a piece of HIM. It’s not. It’s just a desk. It’s staying.

“Just because something belongs to you doesn’t mean you should keep it for the rest of your life. Things are meant to be transitory.”
― Susan Wright

My beloved dining room table.

My table is beautiful. It’s truly the best piece of furniture I’ve ever owned. It’s an eight seater teak wooden table that was simply massive. We had to choose the houses we lived in based on where the table would fit in. I loved my table so much.

More than the table, I love the memories that I made at that table. As a family, with my family. We had dinner parties and Sunday lunches. We wrote our dissertations at that table. We folded laundry on the table, we collected piles of junk on that table. That table was the centre of our home. When we had Oden we had to swap the lounge and dining room space as we needed more living room. Our table became that too big piece of furniture that had to go. We didn’t get rid of it.

When we decided to move to New Zealand – we looked at houses on the internet and we knew that it was time. It was finally time to say good-bye to our beloved table. An inanimate piece of furniture that had come, over the last decade, to feel like a part of the family.

And so we put it up for sale and we waited.

A few people came to look at it but everyone said the same thing “it’s too big for my house” we knew it would be a struggle but it had to be done.

After months and months, the table finally sold. I am heartbroken.

“The things you used to own, now they own you.”
― Chuck PalahniukFight Club

My replacement table, a tiny four seater table now sits in the place my beautiful table used to be. It’s ridiculous how lost and little it looks in comparison. I am truly heartbroken.

At the end of the day – a table is just a thing.

The memories we made at the table are in my heart, in my memory. It’s not about the things. It’s about how we feel, the good times we have. It’s about the life we spent living around that table with the people we love. It’s not about the things we own.

It’s about the love we have!

 

 

[bctt tweet=”Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go and then do it. Ann Landers” username=”tyrannyofpink”]

Comment

6 Comments

  • Helen
    26th February 2018

    Awwwwww, sorry hun. It is really tough, and I can totally relate. We left with just our luggage so had to get rid of everything. It was truly hard! I the last couple of days, I couldn’t bear to clean up the rest of the stuff that had to be done even – because it signalled that it was time to go… My sister adopted my houseplants and my beloved bonsai tree which I’ve had for over 10 years, other than that, I did leave with a couple of things that really meant alot to me. I took my photo albums and letters that my parents had written to me (when I was a teenager).

    But yes, the selling off of favourite furniture pieces is hard! And selling furniture off is just hard on its own! Bloody hell! Some people want you to basically give it to them for free, or want a HUGE discount. That’s what made my blood boil!

    Hang in there hun, it all gets better as that is the process of moving countries… Sending lots of strength for this blue Monday <3

    • TyrannyofPink
      Helen
      28th February 2018

      OH MY GOOODNESSSSS ME!! I was so angry half the time selling things off. We got this company in to evaluate selling a few items together. She basically quoted me what I sold my table for, for EVERYTHING and then was extremely rude when I said no thanks, I’ll sell them off myself then. She said “ha, you think you can but no one wants your stuff” – I’ve literally never shooed someone out the gate like I did that woman. SO damn rude.

      People don’t care that these things are personal. They hold memories and stories and getting rid of each item is painful. I’m so glad your sister adopted your plants. I’m so sad about the three that I have that I somehow manage to keep alive! One is REALLY special to me, it was given to me by an old man I taught computer lessons to in an old age home. He basically grew the bulb for me and I didn’t know I could love a plant until it came into my life!

      I’m sorry you know this feeling – I suppose it’s a sacrifice we choose to make!! It’s hard! xoxo

  • Simone Cameron
    26th February 2018

    Ahhhh I can feel the sentimental-ness (yes it isn’t a word…lol) all over this. Especially when somebody is no longer with you….it’s so hard. The bed my dad got us when we got married…I felt the same way. Ended up giving it to my brother though, so I have this feeling of ‘It’s still in the family’.

    I feel so sad reading this…. 🙁 As your mom says though, you have all those memories…and they’ll be with you forever <3

    • TyrannyofPink
      Simone Cameron
      26th February 2018

      I’m sorry for the depressing Monday morning post but this is basically my life now lol see why I’m always drinking wine! I agree, it’s nice to keep it in the family!!

  • Bonnie
    26th February 2018

    I know how hard this was for you. The table is gone but the memories you made are forever. Hugs my angel.
    ??

Leave a Reply

Previous Post
Spring Wedding Trends
Read More
Next Post
Meet Nic : Game Programmer!
Read More